Self care ideas: a big list of small things that help

Free self care ideas

• Go for a walk with no destination.
• Borrow a book from the library.
• Have a long bath or shower and take your time.
• Go to bed thirty minutes earlier.
• Delete or mute one app that leaves you feeling worse.
• Write a page in a notebook about how today was.
• Make a playlist for a mood you want more of.
• Sit in a park, on a bench, and do nothing.
• Do a small stretch routine from a free video.
• Say no to one thing this week.

Self care ideas at home

• Change your sheets and get into a clean bed.
• Light a candle or open a window for fresh air.
• Cook a simple meal you like, and eat it sitting down.
• Clear out one drawer or one shelf.
• Put a blanket and a book in a spot you can reach.
• Do a load of washing so there is clean stuff for tomorrow.
• Put on a film you have seen before and enjoy.
• Water the plants, or bring something green into the room.
• Turn off the main light and use a lamp.
• Make your bed in the morning, so you come back to something tidy.

Self care ideas to do outside

• Walk round the block and notice five things you have not seen before.
• Eat your lunch outdoors.
• Sit in the sun, or in the rain under a hood, for five minutes.
• Visit a local park, canal, beach or hill.
• Take a photo of something small and nice.
• Pick up a leaf, a shell or a stone and keep it on your desk.
• Get off the bus a stop early and walk the rest.
• Look at the stars if the evening is clear.
• Have a coffee at a table outside.
• Plant something, even one pot.

Self care ideas with other people

• Ring a friend while you walk.
• Send a voice note instead of a text.
• Ask someone you trust, 'Can I tell you about my week?'
• Have a cup of tea with a neighbour.
• Cook with someone, or eat together.
• Join a class or a club that meets in person.
• Ask for a hug from someone you trust.
• Say 'I could use some help with this' to one person.
• Spend time with a pet, yours or a friend's.
• Tell someone thank you, and say why.

If you want more friends to do these with, the guide to making friends as an adult can help.

Self care ideas for your mind

• Write a list of everything on your mind, then circle the one that matters today.
• Read a few pages of something you enjoy, not something you should read.
• Do a puzzle, a crossword or a word game.
• Draw, colour or doodle with no goal.
• Take a break from the news and your phone for an hour.
• Write down three things that went okay today.
• Try a short guided meditation or a body scan.
• Learn one new thing, such as a word in another language or a recipe.
• Talk kindly to yourself, as you would to a friend.
• Close all your open tabs and start again.

A body scan script is one free option if you want something guided.

Self care ideas for hard days

On a hard day the aim is not to do more. It is to do the bare minimum that keeps you going.

• Drink some water and eat something, even if it is toast.
• Take a shower or wash your face.
• Open the curtains or a window.
• Wear comfortable clothes.
• Message one person: 'Today is a hard one.'
• Take a short walk, even to the end of the road.
• Put one thing on your list for tomorrow and let the rest wait.
• Cry if you need to, then have a drink of water.
• Watch or listen to something familiar and gentle.

It helps to write your own bare minimum list on a good day, so it is ready when you need it. The self care planner has a space for it.

Self care ideas at work

• Take your full lunch break, away from your desk.
• Stand up and stretch once an hour.
• Keep a water bottle where you can see it.
• Turn off notifications for one block of time.
• Write your top three tasks for the day, and let the rest wait.
• Take a five-minute walk between meetings.
• Put a photo or a plant on your desk.
• Say 'I'll get back to you by Thursday' instead of answering at once.
• Leave on time on one day this week.
• Keep a snack in your bag so you do not skip meals.

If work is the main thing wearing you down, the guide to work boundaries shows ways to protect your time.

How to choose self care ideas that actually help

The idea that helps is the one that fits what drained you. A bath will not fix a day of back-to-back meetings. A long talk will not fix a body that needs sleep. Ask yourself first, 'What am I short of right now?'

• If your body is tired, pick sleep, food, water or gentle movement.
• If your head is full, pick writing things down, a screen break or a walk.
• If you feel flat or on your own, pick time with a person or a pet.
• If you feel pulled in too many ways, pick an idea that protects time, such as saying no.

There are different kinds of rest, and each one fills a different gap. The types of rest guide can help you match them.

Start with one idea, not five. Try it, then notice how you feel afterwards. If it did not help, that is information, not failure. Try a different one next time.

Self-care isn't only bubble baths

Some of the most useful self-care is dull. It is the admin you have been putting off, and it takes weight off your mind.

• Book the appointment you have been avoiding, such as a GP, dentist or optician.
• Pay the bill or open the letter.
• Make a simple budget for the month.
• Sort the washing or the fridge.
• Refill your prescription.

Saying no is a kind of self-care too. If you find it hard, the guide to saying no has short phrases you can use.

When self-care isn't enough

Self-care is not a cure for everything. If you are doing lots of kind things for yourself and still feel empty, worn out or hopeless, that is a sign you need more than a list. It is not a sign that you are doing it wrong.

Constant tiredness, dread about work, feeling detached or cynical, or finding that nothing helps can be signs of burnout. The guide to the signs of burnout describes them.

If you have felt low, anxious or exhausted for two weeks or more, or it is affecting your sleep, work or relationships, speak to a GP. You deserve real support, not just a list.

When to get more support

If you ever feel unsafe or have thoughts of harming yourself, call Samaritans on 116 123 (UK and Ireland), 988 (US), or find a line at findahelpline.com. If you are in immediate danger, call 999 (UK) or 911 (US).