Grief worksheet: a free, gentle printable for after a loss

Does a grief worksheet help?

Honestly, we don't know of a trial of this worksheet, and a worksheet isn't a treatment for grief. What we can tell you is where the ideas come from and what the research does and doesn't say.

The tone and the 'looking after myself' section follow what the NHS says about grief: that there's no right or wrong way to feel, that feelings can come and go and can appear unexpectedly, and that talking to someone, regular meals and exercise, and small goals can help. The NHS also describes the five stages of grief and says you may not go through all of them, in order, which is why the worksheet doesn't use them.

Writing is the part we are most careful about. In a 2000 randomised study by Range, Kovac and Marion, 64 undergraduates who had lost someone to an accidental death or a homicide started a writing project (44 completed it), writing for 15 minutes a day over four days about either their bereavement or neutral topics. Both groups improved by a six-week follow-up and the abstract reports no difference between them overall. The bereavement-writing group reported less subjective distress on days 1 to 3. The study was small and was of students, so it can't tell us how it would go for you. A 2006 meta-analysis by Mogk and colleagues combined the results of 30 trials of writing about stressful experiences and found no significant effects overall on physical or psychological health measures. So writing here is a place for your thoughts, not a proven way to feel better.

The 'facing it and taking a break from it' section borrows from the dual process model that Margaret Stroebe and Henk Schut proposed in 1999. It describes grieving people moving between facing the loss and taking a break from it, and treats the break as part of coping. The abstract we read presents it as a model and gives no findings, so we offer it as an idea to try, not a fact about how you should grieve.

If grief is making it hard to cope, the self-care worksheet, the feelings wheel and the self-compassion worksheet can sit alongside it, but the NHS lists talking to someone as something that can help, and a GP or the Cruse helpline are good places to start.

These are educational self-reflection tools, not therapy. See our editorial standards.

If you want to go deeper

• NHS. Grief after bereavement or loss (nhs.uk).
• Cruse Bereavement Support. Helpline (cruse.org.uk/get-support/helpline).
• Range, L. M., Kovac, S. H. & Marion, M. S. (2000). Does writing about the bereavement lessen grief following sudden, unintentional death? Death Studies, 24(2), 115-134.
• Mogk, C., Otte, S., Reinhold-Hurley, B. & Kroner-Herwig, B. (2006). Health effects of expressive writing on stressful or traumatic experiences: a meta-analysis. Psycho-Social Medicine, 3, Doc06.
• Stroebe, M. & Schut, H. (1999). The dual process model of coping with bereavement: rationale and description. Death Studies, 23(3), 197-224.

Your questions, answered

What is a grief worksheet?

A grief worksheet is a set of gentle questions and blank space to write about a loss: who or what you miss, what you're feeling, and what is helping. It isn't a programme or a test. This one has no stages and no timetable, and you can use as much or as little of it as you like.

How do I use this grief worksheet?

Print it or type straight onto the page, and take it one section at a time. Start with 'Before I start' so you have a plan if it gets heavy. Skip anything that doesn't fit, and stop whenever you need to. Your answers save in your browser if you fill it in on screen, and nobody else sees them.

Are there stages of grief?

You may have heard of five stages: denial, anger, depression, bargaining and acceptance, in no set order. The NHS describes them and says you may not go through all of them, or in order. This worksheet doesn't follow them. Grief can show up differently for each person, and there's no right or wrong way to feel.

How long does grief last?

No one can give you a timetable, and this page doesn't try to. The NHS says there's no right or wrong way to feel. The NHS says that for some people grief lasts many months or years, and calls this prolonged grief disorder. It lists signs such as very difficult feelings that don't get any easier as the months go by, difficulty accepting the death, not being able to return to everyday activities, and suicidal thoughts, and says to see a GP if you have them. It is more likely after a traumatic or sudden death. Nobody can give you a timetable, but you can ask for help at any point.

Does writing about grief help?

We can't promise it will. In one small randomised study of 64 university students bereaved by an accidental death or a homicide (44 finished), those who wrote about their bereavement for 15 minutes a day over four days did no better by six weeks than those who wrote about trivial topics. Both groups had improved. The bereavement-writing group did report less distress on the first three days. A 2006 review that combined the results of 30 trials of writing about stressful or traumatic experiences found no significant effects overall on health measures. Writing may still give you a place to put your thoughts, but it isn't a treatment.

Is this worksheet free, and is it a substitute for support?

It's completely free, with no payment and no email needed. It's an educational self-reflection tool, not therapy or medical advice. In the UK you can call the Cruse Bereavement Support helpline on 0808 808 1677 (free; hours are on cruse.org.uk), speak to your GP, or call Samaritans on 116 123. In the US call or text 988, or find a helpline at findahelpline.com. Our helplines page lists more.

Keep going, related worksheets

Grief

Grief Journal Prompts

Free, gentle grief journal prompts for after a bereavement: who you miss, what you feel, what you wish you'd said. Skip any prompt. No stages. Free PDF.

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Self-care

Self-Care Worksheet

A free, printable self-care worksheet for adults: check six areas of your life, see what drains and refills you, and make a self-care plan that costs nothing.

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Self-awareness

Feelings Wheel

A free printable feelings wheel (emotion wheel) PDF: six core feelings and 36 more precise words, with a daily check-in and a week log to name what you feel.

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